Friday, October 5, 2012

Today my Spine Hurts.

I'm typing this supine, because every time I sit or stand, a portion of my spine grinds on another portion of my spine, and I get nauseous, dizzy, and headachy. At the same time, the longer I lie here, the more painful my spine becomes, and the harder it becomes to breath because of where the pain is. Today is one of the days when I really feel disabled.

Make no mistake: My headaches are crippling. If I am caught unawares when a headache hits, I hit the floor. A random passerby offered to call 911 for me yesterday when I screamed a little and dropped into a crouch in the middle of the sidewalk.

But it's been over a year since the headaches came back. I've learned coping techniques to beat back the pain -- sometimes literally -- and continue dealing with my day -- albeit slowly and painfully. I have stopped remembering that things that make you scream and fall down are, in fact, disabling.

The fact that my spine becomes a large sea-urchin as it slides under my shoulder blades is something that only happens every once in a while. The weather is changing, fall is abut to turn the corner and become crisp and golden. As such, the possible fracturing in my spine is letting me know once again that it is there and willing to help.

Today is going to take a while.

Wednesday, October 3, 2012

For the Love of Big, Bad Dogs.

I have a funny reaction whenever I see a big dog, particularly something with a Reputation. Pitt Bulls, German Shepherds, Rottweilers, Dobermans and other "Dangerous" dogs never fail to elicit a coo of "PUP-PEEE..." and a stupid grin. There is something about a big happy doggy with a head the size of a basket ball and muscles on his muscles that makes me go all gooey and soft.

I have yet to meet a "Bad" dog. I have met broken dogs, dogs whose owners have maltreated them, and who, for a while, were too frightened of people to be Happy Puppies. I have met dogs whose owners wouldn't, or couldn't, give them the care, training, and discipline they needed, and so didn't know that their behavior was unacceptable. I have met dogs whose owners have trained them to attack whatever moves.

But I have never met a dog who was genuinely cared for, truly loved and properly trained, who could be classed as "Bad".

Well, except for T-Bone, but my interaction with him was limited to whenever he came speeding out of his driveway to hit our car or attack my bike...

Let me repeat myself: I have only ever met one dog who made me feel unsafe. He is the only dog who has ever bit me (and a good swift kick got me disentangled from that with only a single minor puncture wound, and speeding away on my bike), and has on several occasions hit our car as we drove past.

He was (Maybe is -- I'm not sure if he's dead yet or not) an Australian Shepherd mix, and a phonecall from my father lead to a closed gate and a "Beware of Dog" sign. In the case of this dog, I have no way of knowing what his homelife was like. I cannot tell you what lead to his "Bad" behavior. I know the interaction I had with him, and nothing more.

I have plans, eventually, when I'm out of a tiny apartment and into a house I can have a puppy in, to spend several months combing through animal shelters and rescues for just the right puppy. Most likely, at this junction, I see myself with an American Pitbull Terrier.

Because how can you avoid falling in love with a face like this?
Image: http://www.yourpurebredpuppy.com/

I have two reasons to put forth here for wanting an APBT:

First, partially due to public and media bias, partially due to a naturally protective nature, the pittie makes a good deterrent to people attacks. Which, frankly, frighten me way more than dog attacks ever could. I have been attacked by people. They're a lot harder to stop than dogs, and a lot more likely to attack me.

Second, and this might not seem like a plus to most people, but it takes a strong will to train and care for a strong-willed dog. There are few things better for building up the character of a person than training and maintaining a healthy bond with a naturally dominant dog. If anything can help me learn to stand my ground, it would be a dog who wants to boss me around.

Also, I want a running partner, and a puppy is always willing to run with you.